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Appointing Your Children as Executors: Pros and Cons

· 29 min

Note: The following scenario is fictional and used for illustration.

Margaret, 62, sat at her kitchen table with her will draft, pen hovering over the "Executors" section. She had three adult children: David (38), a solicitor; Emma (35), a teacher; and James (32), who'd just started his own business. Should she name all three to be fair? Just David because he knew the legal process? Or hire a professional executor to avoid any family conflict?

Margaret's paralysis is common. According to the National Wills Report 2024, 53% of UK adults have a will, but executor selection remains one of the most challenging decisions in the will-writing process. Even more concerning, Which? reports that High Court cases against "rogue executors" rose to 87 in 2024, up from 72 in 2022, with sibling conflicts accounting for a substantial portion.

This guide will help you weigh the real pros and cons of appointing children as executors, when it works well, when it creates problems, and what alternatives exist—so you can make the right decision for your family.

Table of Contents

What Does an Executor Actually Do?

An executor is the person legally responsible for administering your estate after you die. It's a position of trust that carries significant responsibilities and, crucially, personal liability for any mistakes.

The role involves eight core duties that typically take 40-100 hours to complete over 6-12 months:

1. Register the death and obtain death certificates (£11 each). You'll need multiple copies for banks, insurance companies, and government departments.

2. Locate the original will and inform all beneficiaries named in it. The original signed will is essential—copies aren't sufficient for probate.

3. Value the estate comprehensively. This means identifying all assets (property, savings, investments, pensions, personal possessions) and debts. Property valuations must be accurate for inheritance tax purposes.

4. Apply for probate. Complete probate forms and pay the £300 probate application fee for estates over £5,000. As of April 2025, the average waiting time for a grant of probate is 6.3 weeks for digital applications.

5. Notify relevant organizations. Contact banks, HMRC, insurance companies, utilities, pension providers, and the Department for Work and Pensions about the death.

6. Pay debts and taxes. Settle outstanding bills, calculate and pay inheritance tax if the estate exceeds £325,000 (the nil-rate band), and ensure all tax liabilities are cleared before distribution.

7. Distribute the estate according to the will. Transfer property, cash, and possessions to the named beneficiaries once all debts and taxes are paid.

8. Keep meticulous records. Maintain detailed accounts of all estate transactions for beneficiaries and HMRC. You may need to provide these if questioned.

Here's what many people don't realize: executors are personally liable for mistakes. If you distribute assets before paying all debts, you must cover shortfalls from your own money. If you miscalculate inheritance tax, you're responsible for penalties and interest.

David, as executor of his father's estate, spent approximately 60 hours over 8 months handling probate for a straightforward estate worth £280,000 with a house, savings, and small pension. Despite being a solicitor, he found the administrative burden "relentless" during a period of active grief.

Can You Legally Appoint Your Children as Executors?

Yes, you can appoint your children as executors—but there are important legal requirements and practical considerations to understand.

Age Requirements

Executors must be at least 18 years old when you die under the Senior Courts Act 1981. You can name a minor (under 18) in your will, but they cannot act as executor or apply for probate until they reach adulthood. If a minor is sole executor when you die, someone with parental responsibility must apply for letters of administration until they turn 18.

Number of Executors

You can appoint up to four executors to apply for probate simultaneously. Most legal experts recommend appointing at least two executors to share the workload and provide continuity if one dies or becomes unable to act.

You can name more than four in your will, but only four can act at once. Additional executors hold "power reserved"—they can step in later if needed, but they're not involved in the initial probate application.

Beneficiaries as Executors

Yes, beneficiaries can be executors. This is extremely common. There's no conflict of interest issue as long as the executor follows the will faithfully and acts impartially. Executors who are also beneficiaries must still prioritize all beneficiaries' interests equally, not just their own.

Substitute Executors Are Essential

Always name substitute (backup) executors in case your primary choice cannot or will not serve. Substitutes step in automatically if named executors die before you, renounce the role after your death, or are unable to act due to illness or incapacity.

Sarah named her daughter Emma (age 35) and son Tom (age 16) as joint executors. When Sarah died three years later, Emma applied for probate alone. Tom, now 19, could have joined if needed, but Emma handled everything competently on her own.

The key takeaway: appointing children as executors is legally straightforward—the challenge isn't legal eligibility, it's practical capability and family dynamics.

The 5 Key Advantages of Appointing Children as Executors

Before considering the risks, let's examine why so many parents choose their children as executors. The benefits are genuine and significant.

1. Trust and Deep Familiarity

Your children know your values, your family dynamics, and your intentions better than any professional. They understand the emotional significance of personal possessions and can distribute sentimental items with sensitivity that no stranger could match.

Michael, executor of his father's estate, knew that his father's watch should go to his younger brother—even though it wasn't specified in the will—because Dad always said so. A professional executor would have followed the will's generic "personal effects to be divided equally" clause and might have sold the watch.

2. No Professional Fees—Significant Cost Savings

Professional executors charge 1.5-2.5% of the estate's value, or £4,800-£7,200 for straightforward estates. For more complex estates valued over £250,000, fees can reach 4% of the gross estate plus 20% VAT.

For a £300,000 estate, professional fees could be £3,000-£15,000. That money comes directly out of beneficiaries' inheritance. Children typically serve for free, though they can claim reasonable expenses (travel, postage, death certificates) from the estate—usually £300-£600 total.

The savings benefit your family members. Every pound saved on executor fees is a pound that goes to the people you love.

3. Emotional Investment in Fulfilling Your Wishes

Children have personal motivation to honor your memory and wishes accurately. Unlike paid professionals processing dozens of estates simultaneously, they care deeply about family relationships and fairness among beneficiaries.

They'll spend extra time on subjective decisions—choosing readings for your funeral, ensuring your charity donations go to causes you truly cared about, handling sensitive family communications with empathy.

4. Family Continuity and Understanding

Children understand complex family relationships: who's estranged, who needs financial support, who requires sensitive communication. They can navigate difficult dynamics—step-siblings, divorced parents, vulnerable relatives—with context a professional would never have.

Emma knew her mother wanted her estate kept private from extended family members who had caused pain during her lifetime. A professional executor might not have understood this sensitivity without explicit written instruction—and even then might have felt uncomfortable denying information requests.

5. Availability and Accessibility

Children are typically easy to contact and readily available. Beneficiaries—often siblings or other family members—feel comfortable asking questions and staying informed throughout the probate process.

There are no office hours, no appointment scheduling, no formal letters required. Family can communicate naturally: "How's probate going?" over Sunday lunch, rather than formal update meetings at a solicitor's office.

These advantages explain why appointing children is so common—and often works beautifully. However, they don't guarantee a smooth probate process. The risks below must be weighed carefully against these benefits.

The 7 Major Risks and Disadvantages

Now for the harder truth: appointing children as executors can create serious problems that damage both the estate administration and family relationships.

1. Lack of Legal and Financial Experience

Most children have never administered an estate and don't understand probate law, inheritance tax calculations, or complex asset valuation. The learning curve is steep, and mistakes can be costly.

Executors are personally liable for errors. James, 29, didn't realize he needed to report a small pension his father had with a former employer. HMRC fined the estate £2,000 for late disclosure—money James had to pay from his own savings because he'd already distributed the estate.

Even straightforward estates involve 20+ procedural steps, complex HMRC forms, and strict legal deadlines. Professional executors handle these routinely. Your children will be figuring it out as they go, often while grieving.

2. Time Burden and Stress During Grief

The executor role demands 40-100+ hours over 6-12 months. Children are often juggling demanding careers, young families, and their own grief. The administrative burden can feel relentless.

Emma, a working mother of two, found herself spending evenings and weekends handling her father's estate for over a year—time she desperately needed to process her loss and care for her own family. "I was so angry," she later admitted. "Angry at Dad for dying, angry at myself for being angry, angry at the endless paperwork. It poisoned my grief."

3. Sibling Conflict and Family Disputes

This is where appointing children most often goes catastrophically wrong. Legal experts increasingly warn that appointing multiple children as joint executors is a common source of inheritance disputes.

Conflicts arise over:

  • Property sales: One sibling wants to sell the family home quickly for practical reasons; another wants to wait for sentimental reasons or better market conditions.
  • Asset distribution: Disagreements over who should receive specific items, especially valuable or sentimental possessions not detailed in the will.
  • Timing: One executor wants to complete probate quickly; another is overwhelmed and needs more time.
  • Workload imbalance: Deep resentment when one sibling does 90% of the work while others contribute nothing but still have decision-making power.

Historical sibling rivalries and jealousies—often dormant for years—resurface under estate stress. The combination of grief, money, and family history is explosive.

David and Emma, appointed as joint executors, stopped speaking for 18 months because David made several decisions without consulting Emma. She felt excluded and disrespected. The probate process, which should have taken 6-9 months, stretched to three years. Legal costs to resolve their disputes consumed £15,000 of the estate.

4. Unanimous Decision Requirement for Property

Joint executors generally must act together, and property decisions require unanimous agreement. A single dissenting executor can create deadlock that paralyzes the entire estate administration.

If executors cannot agree, they must either compromise (often neither gets their preferred outcome) or apply to court for intervention—which is expensive, time-consuming, and further damages relationships.

5. Perceived or Real Conflicts of Interest

When an executor is also a major beneficiary, other family members may question their impartiality—even if the executor is acting entirely properly.

Sarah's eldest son was sole executor and inherited 60% of her estate, with the remaining 40% divided between two younger children. The younger siblings suspected he'd undervalued assets to reduce inheritance tax at the expense of their shares. Independent valuations eventually proved he'd acted fairly, but the accusations damaged their relationship permanently.

Even the appearance of impropriety can poison family dynamics.

6. Difficulty Maintaining Neutrality

Children may struggle to be impartial when distributing assets among siblings, especially if relationships are strained. Emotional attachments to family assets can cloud judgment in ways that professional distance prevents.

The executor who grew up in the family home may find it agonizing to sell it quickly, even when that's the most practical decision. The executor who's closest to one sibling may unconsciously favor them in subjective decisions.

7. Personal Liability for Mistakes

This bears repeating because many people don't fully grasp it: executors are personally liable for errors, negligence, or breaches of duty.

If you distribute the estate before paying all debts or taxes, you must cover shortfalls from your own money. If you fail to identify all assets, you're responsible for the missing value. If beneficiaries sue you for mismanagement, you'll need to defend yourself—potentially at significant personal cost.

An executor who distributed inheritance early, then discovered an unpaid tax bill of £12,000, had to repay that amount from his own savings. His mother's will had made him executor to save professional fees, but the mistake cost him far more than those fees would have been.

When Multiple Children as Joint Executors Works (And When It Doesn't)

Given the risks above, how do you assess whether appointing two or more children jointly will work for your specific family?

When Joint Executors Work Well

Joint executors succeed when you have:

Strong sibling relationships. Brothers and sisters who communicate well, respect each other, and have no history of major conflict. They don't need to be best friends, but they must be able to work together under stress.

Complementary skills. One child has financial expertise; another has organizational skills. They naturally divide responsibilities based on strengths rather than fighting over control.

Geographic proximity. All executors live near the estate's assets (especially property) and can meet easily to make joint decisions. Remote coordination is possible but much harder.

Shared values on major decisions. Agreement on the big questions: Should we sell the house quickly or wait? How do we handle this subjective distribution issue? What priority do we give to completing probate?

Clear communication habits. Regular updates, transparent decision-making, documented agreements. Each executor keeps the others informed without prompting.

When Robert died, his daughters Claire (an accountant) and Lucy (highly organized and detail-oriented) worked seamlessly. Claire handled tax and financial matters; Lucy managed correspondence and documentation. They spoke weekly, made decisions together, and completed probate in 7 months with zero conflict.

When Joint Executors Create Problems

Joint executors struggle when you have:

Pre-existing tensions. Any history of sibling rivalry, jealousy, or serious conflict will likely resurface and intensify under estate stress. Old wounds reopen when money and grief collide.

Unequal relationships with you. If one child was your primary caregiver in later life or had a notably closer relationship, others may resent their "favored" status and question their judgment.

Different financial circumstances. A wealthy child may want to move quickly and isn't concerned about maximizing estate value; a child in financial difficulty may prioritize getting every possible pound from the estate—creating fundamental conflicts.

Geographic distance. Executors in different cities or countries struggle to coordinate. Time zone differences, inability to jointly visit the property, and communication delays cause friction.

Unequal time availability. One executor has flexible time; another has a demanding job and young children. The busy executor becomes a bottleneck, and the available executor resents doing all the work while decisions still require unanimous agreement.

Personality clashes. A controlling, micromanaging executor paired with a laid-back executor equals constant friction. Strong personalities that clash under normal circumstances will explode under estate stress.

The "Fairness" Trap Parents Often Fall Into

Many parents appoint all their children as executors because they worry that choosing some over others will hurt feelings or appear to show favoritism.

Legal experts warn this often backfires spectacularly. Adding more executors doesn't make things fairer—it multiplies the potential for conflict and deadlock.

A better approach: Choose one or two children who are most capable and most likely to work together well. Appoint others as substitute executors—they're included and honored, but not burdened with day-to-day administration unless needed.

Explain your reasoning in a Letter of Wishes. "I've asked David to be executor because of his legal background, and Emma as substitute. This isn't about loving anyone more or less—it's about making probate as smooth as possible for all of you during a difficult time."

Your children will understand practical reasoning far better than they'll understand unnecessary complications that delay their inheritance and damage their relationships.

Alternative Structure: "Power Reserved"

You can appoint one child as lead executor, with siblings having "power reserved"—they can join the administration later if needed, but the primary executor handles routine matters independently.

This gives primary responsibility to your most capable child while allowing others to participate if genuine issues arise. It's a middle ground between sole executor and fully joint executors.

Red Flag Assessment

Ask yourself honestly: Could my children successfully work together on a complex project under significant stress and tight deadlines?

If the answer is "maybe" or "no," don't make them joint executors. The probate process is not the time to hope they'll suddenly develop teamwork skills they've never demonstrated.

Professional Executor vs. Children: Cost and Value Comparison

Let's examine the actual costs—both financial and hidden—of each option.

Professional Executor Costs

Professional executors (solicitors or trust companies) typically charge 1.5-2.5% of the estate's value. For estates over £250,000, fees can reach 4% plus 20% VAT. Some charge fixed fees for straightforward estates: £4,800-£7,200 is common.

Example calculations:

  • £200,000 estate at 2% = £4,000 in executor fees
  • £500,000 estate at 2.5% = £12,500 in executor fees
  • £1,000,000 estate at 2% = £20,000 in executor fees

For complex matters (disputes, business valuations, international assets), professionals may charge hourly rates of £200-£300 in addition to percentage fees.

Important: Your will must include a charging clause allowing the professional to bill the estate. Standard executor appointments don't permit charging fees.

Family Executor Costs

Children serve for free, saving 1-5% of estate value—potentially £5,000-£20,000+ for larger estates. These savings directly benefit beneficiaries.

However, there are expenses:

Reimbursable from estate: Travel, postage, phone calls, death certificates (£11 each), copying costs—typically £300-£600 total. These are legitimate estate expenses.

Hidden costs when problems arise:

  • Legal advice when children get stuck: £200-£300/hour
  • Extended timeline due to inexperience: Property maintenance, lost investment returns, delayed beneficiary access to funds
  • Dispute resolution or mediation: £1,000-£5,000+
  • Court intervention if executors deadlock: £10,000-£50,000+ in legal fees

If sibling executors end up in court, the savings from avoiding professional fees vanish quickly—and family relationships may be destroyed.

Value Comparison Table

Factor Professional Executor Children as Executors
Upfront Cost £4,800-£7,200+ (1-5% of estate) Free (save £5,000-£20,000+)
Expertise Legal and tax expertise Limited/no experience
Efficiency 6-9 months typical 6-12+ months (longer if issues)
Impartiality Completely neutral Potential family bias
Liability Protection Professional insurance Personal liability
Conflict Risk Low—no family dynamics Moderate to high with siblings
Family Relationships Preserved—no favoritism Risk of damaged relationships

When the Professional Fee Is Worth It

Professional executors make financial sense for:

  • Complex estates (business interests, international assets, trusts, multiple properties)
  • Blended families or existing family conflict
  • Vulnerable beneficiaries needing impartial protection (disabled children, those with addiction issues)
  • Large estates where executor mistakes could be extremely costly

When Children Make Financial Sense

Family executors are appropriate for:

  • Straightforward estates (one property, savings, small pension, personal possessions)
  • Strong sibling relationships with demonstrated ability to work together
  • At least one financially savvy, organized child
  • Situations where the significant savings (£5,000-£15,000+) meaningfully benefit family members

Hybrid Approach Worth Considering

Some families appoint one child and one professional as joint executors—combining family knowledge with professional expertise. The professional ensures legal compliance and tax efficiency, while the child provides family insight and continuity.

The professional fee is reduced (you're paying for one professional, not sole professional executor service). This middle ground costs more than family-only executors but less than sole professional executors, while dramatically reducing risk.

5 Signs You Should Choose a Professional Executor Instead

Certain situations strongly favor professional executors over children. Here are five clear indicators:

Sign 1: Your Estate Is Complex

If you own business interests, commercial property, international assets, multiple properties, significant investment portfolios, or have trusts and complex tax structures, children likely lack the expertise to handle these properly.

Mistakes in business valuations, international tax compliance, or trust administration can cost beneficiaries tens of thousands of pounds.

John's estate included a limited company and a holiday property in France. His children had no idea how to value the business for probate purposes or navigate French inheritance laws. They spent £18,000 on professional advice anyway—more than a professional executor would have cost—and the probate process took 2.5 years.

Sign 2: You Have a Blended Family

Second marriages with children from previous relationships create inherent conflicts of interest. Step-children may have different interests from your biological children. Your current spouse and your adult children from your first marriage may have competing priorities.

An impartial professional can navigate these sensitive dynamics without favoritism accusations poisoning relationships.

Margaret's will left her house to her second husband for his lifetime, then to her children from her first marriage after his death. A professional executor ensured fairness and prevented conflict between her husband and children, who had different views on property maintenance and insurance during the life interest period.

Sign 3: Your Children Don't Get Along

Any history of sibling rivalry, jealousy, or serious conflict suggests professional neutrality is essential. Children who don't speak regularly or have strained relationships should not be forced to work together as executors.

One child likely to dominate or exclude others from decisions? That's a recipe for disaster.

Legal expert warning from Osbornes Law: "If siblings struggle to agree on where to have Christmas dinner, they'll struggle to agree on estate administration involving hundreds of thousands of pounds."

Sign 4: Your Children Lack Financial or Legal Experience

If none of your children work in finance, law, or business management—and they've expressed feeling overwhelmed by the responsibility—that's a clear signal.

Children in their early twenties with limited life experience may not be ready for the legal and financial complexity of estate administration, even for straightforward estates.

The probate process involves complex HMRC forms, strict legal deadlines, and significant liability. Enthusiasm and good intentions don't substitute for expertise.

Sign 5: You Have Vulnerable Beneficiaries

Beneficiaries with disabilities who need special trusts, minor children requiring guardianship coordination, or beneficiaries with addiction or mental health issues requiring managed distributions all benefit from professional executor expertise.

Professionals understand how to protect vulnerable beneficiaries' interests impartially and structure distributions to preserve means-tested benefits or prevent financial exploitation.

Sarah's will included a discretionary trust for her adult son with learning disabilities. A professional executor ensured the trust was properly established and coordinated with his existing benefits, preserving his eligibility for means-tested support while providing for his needs.

The Middle Ground: Hybrid Approach

If you're torn between professional expertise and family involvement, consider appointing one capable child plus one professional as joint executors.

The child provides family knowledge and ensures the personal, subjective elements are handled sensitively. The professional handles legal compliance, tax, and complex financial matters.

This costs more than family-only executors but significantly less than sole professional executors—and dramatically reduces both conflict risk and error risk.

How to Make the Right Choice for Your Family

You've weighed the pros and cons. Now, how do you actually decide? Follow this systematic approach.

Step 1: Assess Your Estate Complexity

  • Simple estate: One property, savings, pension, personal possessions → children may be suitable
  • Moderate estate: Multiple properties, investments, small business interests → consider professional or hybrid
  • Complex estate: Large business, international assets, trusts, complex tax structures → professional strongly recommended

Step 2: Evaluate Each Child Honestly

Create this checklist for each child:

Capability Factors:

  • Financially responsible and organized
  • Understands basic legal/tax concepts or willing to learn
  • Has time to dedicate 40-100 hours over 6-12 months
  • Lives near estate assets or can travel easily when needed
  • Comfortable with paperwork, deadlines, and meticulous detail

Relationship Factors:

  • Gets along well with all siblings
  • Communicates clearly and regularly
  • Can remain impartial when making difficult decisions
  • Has strong relationship with all beneficiaries
  • No history of serious conflict with other family members

Red Flags (if ANY apply, reconsider appointing this child):

  • History of financial problems or irresponsibility
  • Domineering personality that excludes others from decisions
  • Serious ongoing conflict with siblings
  • Lives abroad with limited UK availability
  • Has expressed reluctance or feeling overwhelmed by the responsibility

Step 3: Consider These Decision Frameworks

Framework A: Single Child as Executor

Best when: One child is clearly most capable and siblings acknowledge this without resentment.

Advantages: Faster decisions, no coordination needed, clear responsibility and accountability.

Risks: Other children may feel excluded or suspect favoritism, even if unfounded.

Mitigation: Explain your decision in a Letter of Wishes. Appoint siblings as substitute executors so they're included and honored but not burdened unless needed. Emphasize the decision is about practical capability, not love or favoritism.

Framework B: Two Children as Joint Executors

Best when: Two children have a strong relationship, complementary skills, and demonstrated ability to communicate clearly and work together on complex projects.

Advantages: Shared workload, mutual accountability, family involvement and knowledge.

Risks: Requires unanimous agreement on major decisions. Coordination takes time and effort. If relationship deteriorates, administration can grind to a halt.

Mitigation: Choose only children who already work well together. Document your expectation that they'll communicate regularly and make decisions jointly. Consider including mediation clause in your will.

Framework C: Professional Executor (Sole or Joint with Child)

Best when: Estate is complex, family dynamics are difficult, children lack experience, or vulnerable beneficiaries need protection.

Advantages: Expertise, impartiality, efficiency, professional liability insurance, preserved family relationships.

Risks: Cost (1-5% of estate value, potentially £5,000-£20,000+). Less family input on subjective decisions.

Mitigation: Choose a reputable firm with transparent pricing. Consider hybrid approach: appoint one capable child + professional as joint executors for balance.

Step 4: Always Appoint Substitute Executors

Name 1-2 backup executors in case your primary choice cannot or will not serve. This is critical.

Substitutes can be other children, trusted friends, professionals, or a combination. They step in automatically if primary executors die before you, renounce the role after your death, or become unable to act.

Without substitutes, the court must appoint an administrator if your named executors can't serve—causing delays, additional costs, and loss of your control over who manages your estate.

Step 5: Have the Conversation

Don't assume—ask potential executors if they're willing to serve. This conversation should happen while you're writing or updating your will.

Explain the role clearly: the time commitment (40-100 hours), the responsibilities (8 core duties), the liability (personal responsibility for mistakes), and the timeline (6-12 months typically).

If choosing one child over others, discuss your reasoning. Emphasize that it's about practical capability, not love or trust. Confirm they understand they can decline—either now or after your death through formal renunciation.

Step 6: Document Your Decision and Review Regularly

In your will: Name executors clearly with full legal names and addresses. Include charging clause if appointing professional executor.

In a Letter of Wishes: Explain your reasoning, especially if your choice might be questioned or could hurt feelings. Provide guidance on subjective decisions (sentimental items, funeral preferences).

Review every 3-5 years or after major life events: Marriages, divorces, deaths, serious illnesses, geographic relocations, career changes, or deteriorating relationships all warrant executor review.

Circumstances change. Your eldest daughter may have been the obvious choice at 35 but might be overwhelmed caring for elderly in-laws by 50. Your son may have matured from an irresponsible 25-year-old to a capable 40-year-old. Regular reviews ensure your executor choice remains appropriate.

Final Guidance

The right executor choice balances trust, capability, and family dynamics. Don't appoint children just because it's traditional or expected—appoint the person (or people) most likely to administer your estate efficiently, fairly, and with minimum conflict.

Sometimes that's your children. Sometimes it's not. Sometimes it's a carefully chosen combination of family and professional expertise.

The best choice is the one that protects your beneficiaries' inheritance, preserves family relationships, and honors your wishes with competence and integrity.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Can I appoint my children as executors of my will?

A: Yes, you can appoint your children as executors, but they must be at least 18 years old when you die. While children under 18 can be named in a will, they cannot act as executors or apply for probate until they reach adulthood.

Q: What are the main advantages of appointing children as executors?

A: The main advantages include trust and familiarity with family dynamics, no professional fees (saving 1-5% of estate value), emotional investment in fulfilling your wishes, and deep understanding of family relationships and potential sensitivities.

Q: What are the risks of appointing multiple children as joint executors?

A: Key risks include sibling conflict leading to probate delays, disagreements over property sales and asset distribution, unequal workload resentment, increased legal costs if disputes escalate, and potential deadlock if executors cannot reach unanimous decisions on property matters.

Q: Should I appoint all my children as executors to be fair?

A: No, appointing all children to appear fair often backfires. It's better to choose one or two children who are financially responsible, organized, and likely to work together. Consider appointing a substitute executor rather than naming all children jointly.

Q: When should I consider a professional executor instead of my children?

A: Consider a professional executor if your estate is complex (property, business interests, international assets), there are existing family tensions or blended family dynamics, your children lack financial experience, or you have vulnerable beneficiaries who need impartial protection.

Q: How much does a professional executor cost compared to appointing children?

A: Professional executors typically charge 1-5% of the estate's value, or £4,800-£7,200 for straightforward estates. Family executors like children serve for free, but may incur costs if they need legal advice or if conflicts cause delays and disputes.

Q: What happens if my child is named as executor but can't or won't act?

A: Your child can renounce their role through a formal Deed of Renunciation before taking any executor actions. This is why appointing substitute or backup executors is crucial—they can step in if your primary choice cannot serve.

Conclusion

Margaret eventually chose her solicitor son David as primary executor, with Emma as substitute and a Letter of Wishes explaining her reasoning. The decision wasn't about favoritism—it was about ensuring her estate would be handled competently and her family relationships would survive the probate process intact.

Key takeaways:

  • Children can be excellent executors IF they have the skills, time, and strong family relationships to handle the role effectively
  • Sibling conflict is the biggest risk—appointing all children to be "fair" often backfires; choose 1-2 most capable instead
  • Professional executors cost 1-5% of estate value (£4,800-£15,000+) but provide expertise and impartiality—worthwhile for complex estates or difficult family dynamics
  • Always appoint substitute executors who can step in if your primary choice cannot or will not serve
  • Review your decision regularly—family relationships and capabilities change; update executor appointments every 3-5 years

Appointing executors is just one decision in creating your will—but it's a crucial one that can either protect your family or create lasting damage. Choose wisely, based on honest assessment of your specific situation, not wishful thinking or tradition.

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Legal Disclaimer:

This article provides general information only and does not constitute legal or financial advice. WUHLD is not a law firm and does not provide legal advice. Laws and guidance change and their application depends on your circumstances. For advice about your situation, consult a qualified solicitor or regulated professional. Unless stated otherwise, information relates to England and Wales.

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